Thursday, December 30, 2010

I Guess What I'm Trying To Say Is.....

You know what happens when you move a lot, like, every two yrs since you were 18? You create single servings, of everything (Thanks Fight Club). Single serving homes, bosses, driving short cuts, friends, gym habits, everything. You stay with one foot out the door knowing the next adventure is just a step away. And while it's a lot of fun to explore new things, cultures, meet new people, it's also really hard to have any semblance of a consistent life. I never said my life was one narrow line, nor do I want it to do. Change is my ever flowing constant, and I love that. But, what if for a moment, I chose to settle? Plant roots, get to know people, let people get to know me, network, volunteer, get involved in my community? Not to say I can't or haven't in the places I've resided for just a short time but moving has become such a habit that sitting still is a voluntary movement. "Ah, these people are nice but when I move I'm sure we won't stay in touch, why bother?" or "This music is okay but since we plan to move I think I'll just ignore it, not get too close" to anything or even anyone. It's hurt me in the long run, here I am two years in and really no one to call a friend. No one nearby I can call and hang out with on the last minute. Not a big deal for a girl who plans to move away again anyway. But what if that's all changed? What if suddenly the looking glass went dim and now all you see is this city surrounding you? What then.

Well I guess that means it's time to explore this twin city and the community. To give myself in to it. Including the music, the people, and the highly opinionated religious views. Time to start weighing in the good and ignoring the bad, at least enough for me to hold my tongue. No more single servings but maybe more servings at the coffee shop. More wine to dine, more wings to eat, more music to explore, more pictures to take. Time to plant some roots and sit around for a while. Have the feeling of truly relaxing and calling a city home. I always believe that home is where you lay your head at night as long as those you care about are nearby. Doesn't matter if it's a hotel, another city, a loft, a house, or even a tent, where your heart lays so does your home. But wouldn't it be nice to really feel at home in a city? To know the city streets, the people, the vibe? To feel it beat within your own heart? Wouldn't that be nice to know?

We will see I guess, the beach can wait.

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