Truth

I couldn't have put it better myself;

"I learned that true friendship is not measured in distance but in depth."

Originally posted but this lovely lady.

Good Riddance 2008

So we've finally made it, the end of the line, the finish of all races, the final countdown. Instead of recapping the year in big long drawn out and most likely confusing paragraphs I'm just going to fill out this survey I found Please enjoy!

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?

Hm toughie. I'll go with moving out and into my own apartment for the very first time in my at the time 23 years. It was scary, exciting, nerve-wracking, and amazing all wrapped into one. My little shack was adorable and I definitely left my mark. I moved out six months later when finances got tough, such is life.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I don't even know if I made one last year. If I did it was probably along the lines of lose weight and if so the answer is a quick "no".

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

This girl at work gave birth to her first son. She was made to be a mother.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
No, Thank God.

5. What countries did you visit?
None this year, though I did make the 11 hour trip up north for the first time in about 5 years. Is a memory I'll cherish forever.

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?
A lot of things actually. I don't really like 2008. A lot of stuff happened that couldn't be controlled and put a damper on our spirits. How about for now I'll say financial security.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
No specific dates but I'll remember mid-January when I decided to end a 3 year relationship after much contemplation. It was hard because I realized I had to rely on only myself after it went down. It was totally worth it. Then sometime in the end of February when I gave this guy a chance and it turned into a really good thing. I can't believe it's almost been a year since it happened but I could not be any happier about it. The 4th of July. A drama filled time period that taught me a lot about the people around me, the evil, the good, the ones that will stick with you through it all and the ones out there to hurt you. It was a crazy time period and one I'll never forget. Oh and I got to see a beautiful place in South Carolina where I planned to get married one day.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
Now this is another tough one. My achievement probably was sticking up for myself and my values. To stop accepting the way people treated me and get rid of them. That was a hard thing to do because it messed with my livelihood and I still haven't recovered from that.

9. What was your biggest failure?
Being too trusting of people. I made friends with a few individuals I thought I could trust though I should have known better just from how they treated everyone else. Nowadays new individuals don't know much about me. My word vomit is kept to a minimum and I think it's better that way.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
I had to go to the ER this year. I was in a severe amount of pain and so afraid. Let's just say I'm glad that's over.

11. What was the best thing you bought?
I didn't buy it but the best thing I got this year was my Nikon SLR. It opened new doors for me and the limits are endless.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
hmmm Celebration? What?

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Those assholes I referred to earlier.

14. Where did most of your money go?
Bills, bills, bills. Not much money for fun this year. I am looking to the new year for financial gain. :)

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
My camera, way freaking excited, my trip to Myrtle Beach with my best friend in the whole world, I wasn't sure I was going til right before. Seeing my NY roots again. The adventures with my new love of my life.

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?
hmmmm Probably some Killers song, maybe their new cd, or the "Don't Shoot Me Santa Clause". Plain White T's "Hey There Delilah" because it reminded the lovebug of when we first started dating and so it will now remind me of it. ha

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?
b) thinner or fatter?
c) richer or poorer?
Happier (especially in the relationship department), fatter(truth), poorer (Oh God I'm poor)

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Hmm this is a tough one. I always try to do things I like a lot, so nothing.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
Complaining.

20. How did you spend Christmas?
Crying the first half with my loved one, but Christmas Eve was nicely spent with his side of the family.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?
Yeah, it was pretty rad.

22. What was your favorite TV program?
Dexter. All those stupid reality tv shows you find on MTV and VH1. I love it.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
Hate has anger, I'm not angry anymore.

24. What was the best book you read?
I dn't know. I'm reading one right now called "The Power of Your Subconscious Mind" and it's really empowering. This year I've read less fiction and more....other stuff? Weird.

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Jack Johnson. Yeah I know but I didn't really give him a listen until this year and now he's a regular in my car's 6 cd rotation.

26. What did you want and get?
I wanted a lot of things (admittedly) I also got a lot of things. Most of these were not materials.

27. What did you want and not get?
Peace, less stress, a break. I'm getting it in 2009 though, I will be sure of it.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?
Oh man, I really enjoyed watching the Dark Knight in IMAX. I just love IMAX films.

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I turned 24 and I was at a friend's wedding in the mountains as their wedding photographer.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Not dealing with everything we did earlier this year. It was excessive.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?
Not much, I've let my body go, I'm just sort of wearing clothes that fit. And honestly with all the things I ran into this year weight was the last thing I worried about. This will change though, I miss the heck out of my healthy adorable self.

32. What kept you sane?
My man, my family, my best friend. When the world felt cold I could turn to them and know people still care and will love me forever.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
I gained respect for Paris Hilton and Britney Spears. I know I'm so freaking sorry but their tv shows changed me!

34. What political issue stirred you the most?
The election was crazy. Good riddance Bush!

35. Who did you miss?
My family. Still do, I should be with them right now.

36. Who was the best new person you met?
I didn't really meet anyone this year that made me crazy. The new people at my new/old job helped add humor to my life and make it bearable.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.
Don't be so trusting, don't tell all to those you barely know, keep positive, believe in the positivity in my future, be happy because life is hard.

Whew, I'm done! Happy New Year everyone.

First Sale! First Sale!

Woohoo! *Does jiggy dance* (no really)

I just sold my first item on Etsy! So excited. Someone liked my art enough to want it in their home!

Yayayayayayayayayay!

I'm So Excited

I can barely stand it. Lately I've been antsy to get something (ANYTHING) accomplished and after starting my etsy shop last night I've been inspired. As soon as the beau gets his things together we are going to make a trip to the arts and crafts store to spend hours looking for ideas. Definitely getting more canvases.

I remember growing up I was always doing arts and crafts, creating things and ever since going through the painful process of growing up I sort of tossed it to the side. Well, I'm back (not in black) and ready to get dirty (figuratively speaking).

A Few Etsy Finds

I've decided that from now on anything that can be creatively handmade will be purchased through Etsy (or I promise to at least try).

Here are a few finds I WANT WANT WANT (want);


(Made by J2Jewelry)



(Made by WillOaksStudio)

Pearls and silver are so pretty together and I don't own one item of jewelry with pearls. I think these would set the collection off right. :)

I am a Business Owner

RoyalDreams is the name and specialty prints are my game.

haha Actually I have an Etsy shop now so support your lovable, starving (not really) artist and shop here!

Thanks you!!!!

Some Days Are Good Days

Sometimes amidst the sadness and stress lie a few days where there's a break in the clouds and the sun shines it's face. Today was that day and for no particular reason at all. After having to cancel our trip up north yesterday I was a wreck for most of the day but after hearing their responses I began to feel better. Just an FYI, responsibility is a bite in the butt.

Anyway, today was well spent. A nice calm day with my beloved trying to figure out our future steps. If we keep our fingers and toes crossed it looks like things are gonna be alright.

Without the support of my family and my loved one I'd be lost.

How to Make Girlfriend's Day Better

What do you do when your girlfriend has been bawling her eyes out nonstop all morning because she can't see her family this holiday season? Why you cover your face in glitter and hope for the best.



Might I add that I have the most amazing, incredible, sexy, wonderful man alive?

I do, yes I do.

Wallowing in Worry

I can't help it. The bills are piling up and the stack of money is dwindling away. What are we going to do? How will we ever make it? I am so scared of how deep this hole could get that I just want to bury myself in it in hopes of having it end. I know I'm being taught a lesson but I can't get around the destruction enough to see the light.

Help!

The End Result

The other night we baked cookies and had a terribly fantastic time spreading homemade frosting along with sprinkles all over the place. Very tasty evening indeed!

Spreading Cheer

This morning we woke up at super early 8:30 in the morning most likely because we went to bed super early the night before. Anyway, we had a fantastic time getting up together and sharing our morning rituals which due to work and other events we rarely get to do. We headed to Shoney's for the breakfast bar and enjoyed heaps of scrambled eggs, chopped potatoes, and Christmas cheer.

During breakfast Justin told me that his grandmother hadn't put up her Christmas tree yet because she couldn't get to it and refused to ask anyone for help. She had commented to his mother that she just didn't feel like the Christmas Spirit was with her this year and a little bit of cheer was missing in her household. So while gobbling heaps of good food we devised a plan.

After breakfast we headed to a store and gathered a tree stand and gigantic poinsettia, afterwards we picked up a cute little tree perfect for her packed living room. With the tree over his shoulder Justin rang the doorbell waiting to greet her with a jubilant Christmas call. She came to the door in pajamas with a phone to her ear and we could hear her telling Justin's mother we had tree in tow and she had to go.

We spent the day decorating the tree, eating homemade pot pie, and learning how to make peanut butter rolls. When we left we knew her Christmas just got a little brighter. She noted that this was the first real Christmas tree she's ever had and the smell was making her smile ear to ear. It felt great to give to someone else and see the impact it had. The reason for the season.

My Personal Sedative

I know I mentioned earlier that when things aren't going as planned I like to clean my living space. That will work for calming the nerves for a little minute but what I've realized recently is I can lose myself in photography for hours without even noticing the time go by. I feel an itch to take pictures at least every week and am always go through old archives and messing around on Photoshop, or learning more about my camera or any gear I can gather up. I get into a peaceful zone where troubles seem far away and all that matters is improving.

Also, I really really want to work out again. If anyone needs some last minute Christmas ideas I recommend an elliptical or weight machine. Thanks!

One of my favorite shots recently;

Quick Little Bugger

hahaahahahaah

FYI to all you cat lovers out there

Can't say I didn't warn you.

When the Going Gets Tough

I get cleaning. As you all know cleaning is probably my least favorite thing to do. I just love to let things slide until I can't even walk around the room. However, it seems that in highly stressful times my place is immaculate. Maybe my thought process is since my insides are all scattered maybe the place I'm living in shouldn't be. Maybe spending a few hours on a deep overhall keeps my mind off the troubles and on that troublespot. Or maybe the path to a better tomorrow starts at home.

Who can relieve their stress in a messy room anyways? Not us, that's for sure.

Jay, Blue Jay

Jay, Blue Jay
Originally uploaded by Phillip Chitwood

Tweet! Another favorite. View large for the incredible detail. Birds and snow just seem to go together.

Dedicated to my Sister

That we are....

Check it

How cute is this face??

Robin...

Robin...
Originally uploaded by tears of a clown

A new treat! I'm going to start posting some of my favorites from flickr. There's some amazing art that the world should see! Keep your eyes peeled for some incredible work!

You Know How I Know You're a Photographer?

25 Days [3]
Originally uploaded by Little Miss Sunshine.

You get caught doing bizarre things whether it's setting up a scene, contorting your body in a weird position, or carrying your camera in unconventional places in public all for that shot despite the weird looks.

That's how I know you love to shoot and when I see it my heart fills with joy.

Flickr is my second home. :)

You Know When You Just Know

When things just click right into place
like it was supposed to be this way
Just like water runs down
and the sun rises and falls

Like pieces of a puzzle
lost in separate boxes
in separate states
finding their connecting piece

Like milk and cookies
bacon and eggs
items somehow less grand
without their counterpart

You know when you just know
there are no more questions
no more fear, no more sadness
and it will taste as good as bacon and eggs

-Kern

Earlier this Day

So my dog this morning came to me and whispered in my ear with his doggie pleading eyes and said "My dearest wish is to be as bright as the tree in your living room."

So he became the brightest little tree I ever did see.

Dinner

I kill potatoes!

In Hard Times

Children of the 80's and 90's we've grown up in a very privileged world. In a world where every kid participating in sports received a trophy, where punishment at school was no more severe than extra time spent after the last bell and every person was given a fair shake. We were given the biggest gifts and allowed the most freedoms. We didn't suffer from the pains of major world wars or the depression right on our doorstep. We didn't have to fight for our simple rights. We don't know what hungry feels like, wonder where our next home will be, or the threat of fatal disease. We are the lucky ones.

As time will have it we are due for some hardships and maybe it's best we remember the open arms we had growing up, the helping hands that reached out everywhere we went and return the favor to the older generation and the younger ones growing up in this decade. Let us not forget the greatness of our childhood and the values encroached upon ourselves. Help your neighbor, remember your family, and stick together.

Times will be trying and doom is imminent but it does not need to leave a scar.

Oh God, I love Christmas

You guys are going to get sick of me these next few weeks. I'm sitting in my semi dark living room with the tree lights on and XM Holiday music on the tv. I just painted my nails a very cheery burgundy and have been editing some Christmas themed photos.

Snow and Lights

We were lucky enough to get blizzard like snow for a few minutes right after we put the tree up!

This House is Crazy!

They are REALLY into the Christmas Spirit. Pretty sure they annoy their neighbors. Music, lights on the yard, ceilings, on the sides, all the way up to the road! It lit the entire street!

Check out the video!

Exposing Myself

I just joined this site called Exposaroonie where I can submit photos for a contest.

This time I submitted the photo above to represent the theme lines!

Click below to expose your roonie!

Mirror Maze

If you've never been through a mirror maze I definitely recommend it! We have been through two so far and it takes a little getting used to. One is usually enough but the second time we had our cameras with us and ultimately spent more time getting pictures than figuring out the maze.

Even then we managed to make it to the end, turn around, and go back out the way we came with no problem. I only walked into a mirror once (yes it hurts)!


Which one is the mirror, which is the right path??


The colors were constantly changing, reds, blues, greens, multi neon colors, and sometimes going to pitch black. Spooky but so much fun to capture!


Behind loverboy there's a room lit up in purple. It was a large room that had billions of purple lights reflecting everywhere. Way too hard to capture without a tripod but freaky to walk through.



See his reflection everywhere? Sometimes we would get separated and I'd see him pop up in a mirror thinking he was close only to disappear and show up again. Really messes with the mind, only the sense of touch could be trusted.


Colors. Lots of fun funky colors!!!!


The best shot I could get of the purple dotted room.

At then end we were greeted with disco balls!


Overall, amazing experience! Would try again!

Good For A Giggle

My fabulous sister informed me this evening that my father and his girlfriend are trying to decide if I'm engaged or not.

I guess they thought the text I sent my father regarding his "future son in law" went a little too far.

hahaha

Also; my sister is growing up way too fast and thinks she can pawn me in her chess game. haha

What a fun conversation we had today.

Love ya sis.

Animal Wisdom

Do Want

Today we just shopped with our eyes but I found a new bag I want, want, WANT!





I love this pattern and usually Vera Bradley doesn't do it for me but I can just picture myself packing up for the beach in these.

More dreaming from a dreamgirl.

Our Latest Adventure

Today was a mission unbeknown to me at the beginning. I was simply told to pack my camera and a scarf. So I did both and we went on a hunt for some breakfast.

It was lunchtime at this point but I was really craving some hash browns so we made a stop at Huddle House.



Afterward, we stopped at the gas station to pack some munchies for the road. Guess what lover got?


Finally I was told we were on a mission to find snow! Ever since the cold weather crept in I've been talking nonstop about snow! Just recently the mountains nearby had a snowstorm so my boo figured this would be the perfect time to treat his princess to her dearest wish!



On our way through the mountain we didn't see much but a few icicles. We both decided to continue higher up into the mountain to this mall/ski slope/ice skating rink. Maybe then we will find just enough to make a snowball!

We pulled up and there was no snow in sight! Instead of feeling like we wasted a trip we wanted to capture the moment. They had bears, kids skating, adults falling on ice, stores full of trinkets. Enough to keep us occupied.




We got our tickets for the bear exhibit and on down the pathway we finally found some SNOW!




Granted it was man made practice snow it was still that beautimous white fluffy stuff that surrounds so many memories! I got almost too excited.

We managed to get past the snow and onto the bear exhibit. We found a cute pair cuddling up in the corner. The one kept licking the other until it grumbled and then it would hide it's head under the grumpy one. It was way too adorable.



Back inside we checked out the small arcade where we found a game I've never seen before. It was out of order but it was basically an arm wreslting tool against a scary looking man.




After all was said and done we left the mall on the mountain for our favorite little tourist town, Gatlinburg. It was all decked out in Christmas cheer and completely packed!


It was nice to see everything getting ready for this holiday season. I have a feeling this is going to be a great holiday!

On the way home we stopped at a Christmas store and brought our cameras in despite the weird looks. We got a lot of adorable pictures that I might print as Christmas cards! We grabbed dinner here and had some VERY tasty wings!



We also went through a crazy mirror maze that was a lot of fun to take pictures of. They had glow in the dark golf which the boy and I somehow managed to get the SAME score. Not even trying. What??

To make a long story short we had a fabulous time. I'm sure I'll post more pictures later!

Words that ring true

I follow a ladies blog that I absolutely adore. She's in the between stages of writing her heart out and making it into a career choice. I support the latter simply because her words gave the hook that kept me following all this time. She posted a poem yesterday that was nothing short of adorable. There was a little snippet that spoke straight to my soul and I have felt the need to post it below;

"if this was chapter three
in between your fingers and my skin
i would pencil in forever. and yes please. and this is it."

You can find her poem here

Today's Outfit

Inspired by black and white, my favorite item out of this piece is the bracelet.


black and white by Kroyal

Elf Yourself

Send your own ElfYourself eCards

Do it!

Today's Outfit

Ok this site is seriously addicting. I want this sweater so bad!!


winter by Kroyal

This Will Be Too Fun

Fun by Kroyal

My fun outfit for the day. Check out that necklace.

A girl can dream....

Apparently, I Rock Too Hard

Today was indeed an interesting one for at least 15 minutes. I went to work as usual and the recording of the news my boss mentioned to me kept cycling in my head, pressuring me to keep the good work up and up. "You're number one in Image 7 sales! That's incredible! Keep up the good work" he said. Ok cool, no pressure then. So in an effort to keep my numbers on the up and up I lit that little fire under my butt to keep me chasing after customers.

Let's rewind, I was hired as seasonal. Cool, works for me as I have plans to attend college after the holidays and really just need a job until I get my class schedule. At my interview he stated that I could be made permanent if I do a good job and listen, lets be frank, I excel in customer service and am apparently pretty good at selling too. A little bit of part time work throughout the school year could help with the bills so I have vested interest in keeping my numbers as high as possible. So voila, carrot from string has been dangled in front of face.

I understand this company has "expert" salespeople who know pretty much everything about the items that make them money. That's cool, I have not had any problem giving them those sales when they're free. I do have a problem when they're not anywhere to be found until I've gotten to the end of a spiel and am packing up the goods for purchase. That was my baby I helped nurture, I reserve full rights to the benefits. Unfortunately, it seems we have some whiners in the house.

After completing a sale today a coworker comes up and says "Don't hate me but [manager] says Image people have to stay near the image stuff." I just sort of looked at him, maybe I blinked, I don't remember. Luckily the district manager strolled up and wanted a piece of the pie. We took a walk and had a talk. There's cause for concern that I'm selling too much and his worry is I'm not doing it correctly. As luck would have it though he stepped out onto the floor as I was ringing items up and asked the customers billions of questions on things we should offer them to make a better sale. I nailed every single point, I had all the paperwork filled out correctly, the customer was properly informed of everything, I hadn't missed a beat. That was my firepower.

How can a manager tell an employee not to sell? He can't, and he didn't much to the distaste of my fellow whiny, insecure coworkers. So what could have possibly been a scolding turned into an conversation empowering me to continue hitting those numbers. Take that whiners! If you wanted that sale you should have been there when I scoped the room for you.

Just Let Go

Letting go is probably one of the hardest life lessons one will have to learn. Eventually we will need to know how to cope with certain circumstances that only release can calm. Sometimes we will have to let go of fear to move up the next rung on the ladder. At one point in our lives we will have to release the hold on our childhood and move forward into adulthood. It reminds me of one day when I was 11 that I went into the playroom to live in Barbie world when suddenly I decided it was time to give it up. I walked out of there and told my mother I was done playing with Barbies, she could toss them for all I cared and I never played with them again.

Other times it's letting go of a certain emotion that is ultimately holding us back. My most recent "letting go" moment has been when I realized I could no longer hold onto my anger. Three months ago I went through some trying times brought on by people I trusted, lots of them. It's a time period I'm not soon to forget as it taught me that not everyone is truly your friend even if they go through the motions of being one. It also taught me that these same people will go one step farther and try to hurt you. That was a hard pill to swallow and in the process I became angry. So angry I could barely see. I just wanted revenge, I wanted to self defend, but I couldn't have either. I was drowning in a sea of endless anger.

Now I can let go. I'll never forgive, and I'll never forget the lesson they taught me but in it's place is a happiness I've been seeking for a lifetime and an excitement for the adventure that lies ahead. I'm lucky to be out of that situation and I see that now. I'm better off for the lessons I have learned and am thankful for that now.

So now it's time to let go and grasp onto the next monkey bar in this string of life. Let's go!

To Be In a Dream

I can't help but feel the desire to rest in a hammock laid out by the ocean with dear friends while a guitar strums nearby to the beat of the waves. I can also picture myself in a bar that contains no walls but a ceiling for those unknown bursts of tropical rain. Surrounded by deep hues of reds, greens, yellows just hanging by the sandy beach. Sitting back while surfers carry their boards back to base to log the waves they captured that day and slather aloe on their newly burned noses.

Or maybe I'll be on a boat caressing the blue sea beneath us chasing after the dolphins jumping at the bow on our way to a secluded island hiding treasures of the deep. Upon arriving maybe I'll put on some snorkel gear and check out the moving rainbow beneath the water and the view of the sun trying hard to break through onto the ocean floor. I would possibly gather the strength to swim to shore to relax on a branch surrounded by sand and soak in the view while wondering how life is so sweet for the eyes.

How about instead I'll gather all my items, most importantly my latest book and mp3 player loaded with beachy tunes, and drag them to the shore to sip on a drink with a little umbrella.

At the end of it all maybe I could find a volcano that runs natural hot springs. Then I could wrap myself in a wonderfully plush robe and make my way to the poolside bar for a deliciously tropic drink to relax the days troubles. In the process I would search for the right hot spring tucked away in the dark with greenery as a curtain. I would most likely slowly sink into this natural hot tub and rest on the soft black sand near the miniature waterfall which could also act as a massager.



Yes, that would be the perfect way to end the day. Indeed that would be the perfect way to live a life.