More of the Story Unfolds

Yuck. I don't want to carry on about this, it's such a downer and there's so much good that should be praised in my little bubble of a life and in the world but this story just gets weirder and weirder. How about the part where the grandmother was downstairs THE ENTIRE TIME and had no clue?

(CNN) -- By the time the police officer kicked the door in, it was too late. Kerby Revelus was holding his 5-year-old sister, Bianca, and while the officer watched, he dragged a kitchen knife across her throat with such fury that he decapitated her.

Police outside the Milton, Massachusetts, home where a 23-year-old killed two of his sisters Saturday.

"It's hard to imagine that kind of horror," said Milton, Massachusetts, Police Chief Richard G. Wells Jr.

Mere seconds passed before other officers arrived and rushed into the home in the tony Boston suburb of 25,000.

Police had received a 911 call from another Revelus sibling, 17-year-old Samantha. Suffering from several deep cuts in her upper body, she was losing strength.

"It was clear that she knew she was mortally wounded," Wells said. Watch police chief discuss decapitation »

Samantha managed to explain that her 23-year-old brother had attacked his sisters with a knife, police said. When she was no longer able to keep talking, the injured teen handed her 9-year-old sister, Sarafina Revelus, the phone.

All the while, the kids' grandmother was doing laundry in the basement, apparently unaware of the savagery upstairs, police said. Mother Regina Revelus was at work, and father Vronze Revelus was not at home.

As officers surrounded the home and rushed into every room, Kerby ran into a bedroom where Samantha was on the floor, dead. Sarafina was on the floor near her sister's body, according to Wells.

Kerby Revelus then began attacking Sarafina with the knife, Wells said, prompting police open fire and kill him.

On Tuesday, the two slain siblings and their attacker were buried together. Sarafina Revelus returned home Tuesday after undergoing surgery Monday morning for wounds.

It was not the first time police have visited the home answering a domestic violence call, Wells said.

In September 2004, Kerby Revelus was arrested for punching one of his sisters in the face as they fought about money, the chief said. The Boston Herald identified the sibling as Jessica Revelus, who was not in the home during Saturday's attack.

Jessica Revelus told officers at the time that "she was not in fear of her brother," according to a police report from the incident, the Boston Herald reported. A charge of domestic assault and battery was dismissed because she refused to cooperate, Wells said.

Kerby was then in his last year at Milton High School.

But Kerby was in trouble a year later, in 2005, when he was charged with carrying a firearm without a license after he attempted to purchase alcohol at a Randolph, Massachusetts, liquor store. He was given a six-month sentence and was released in September 2008.

CNN reached Jessica Revelus by phone Tuesday. She seemed distraught and said she had not been able to sleep. Her brother's rampage came, she said, "out of the blue."

When asked whether he had a temper or had given any indication that he might want to hurt his sisters, she said, "I don't know. I am not good right now. I am not good."

On Monday, Jessica Revelus told the Boston Herald that "I was never afraid of him. I called the police because he thought he was so big and bad."

Jessica Revelus told the newspaper that her sister Samantha "would get into arguments" with Kerby over "little stuff" and that Kerby and her father were not speaking.

Police are unclear about what set the brother off Saturday, and Wells said he's being careful not to speculate.

Vronze and Regina Revelus said through a family spokesman that they had "no explanation" for their son's savagery, according to the Boston Herald.

"How much can you put on the shoulders of one family?" Wells asked.

Wells praised the first officer on the scene Saturday.

"I don't have words to articulate how this officer maintained his ability to do his job, " he said. "To go in and witness that first thing, just as he opens the door and stay on his radio through the whole thing ..."

He added that the horror of the day rippled through the force. "You can bet that our officers went home after this, and they hugged their wives and their children that much tighter. I hope that for this family and for my officers, that there can be a way to get through.

"We are going to try to make them whole as soon as possible, even though the events of this past weekend

So A 23 Year Old

Pops a fuse, I'm guessing, hoping and decapitates his 17 year old sister. While decapitating his 5 year old sister the cops bust in and shoot him dead saving the 9 year old sister.

Here's my thought process;

First I'd wonder what went so horribly wrong with the killer, what kind of messed up things went through his brain to create such a horrendous event? I'd assume that the family probably knew he was a little off, the news reports may say otherwise but it's hard for me to believe a genuinely good person turns into THAT. Next I'd wonder what it was like to be there. Where were the parents in all of this? Was the 23 yr old visiting or living at home still, why? Next I'd picture myself as one of the decapitated girls. The excruciating pain they endured before passing, at what point did they finally give up and pass? What did it feel like to get rip torn at the neck, seriously it boggles my mind. Then I'd wonder about the cops. Kudos to them for being hereos, as I see it someone from inside probably called 911, or SOMEBODY, to get the cops. When they arrived they most likely heard the loud screams coming from the 5 yr old and burst in. This reminds me that cops are hated until they're needed. For instance, if this wasn't a horrific murder scene the cops would be in trouble for breaking in.

Moving on my next thought process would be about the 9 yr old survivor. There's no way she didn't know what was going on and a high possibility she saw her two sisters die in a most brutal way. She most likely knew he was coming for her next but thankfully the cops burst in and she watched her brother die in a spray of bullets. Yesterday, this little girl lost her innocence forever and possibly her sanity. I try to imagine what her psyche is going through. The visions she keeps seeing everytime she closes her eyes while at the same time mourning the death of her family members. She will never be the same and it makes me sad. Right now at this fork in the road she can go so many different ways, down a deep road of depression, maybe a spiteful trip to revenge, or maybe so lost she doesn't know where she is. I just hope she is surrounded by a lot of people who can protect her.

And that is what I think every time I read something horrific. Maybe I empathize a little TOO much but I can't help the feelings of sadness when I read something so terrible. Am I the only one?

With her toes in the sand....

ARE YOU KIDDING ME??

Speedy

This is what happens when you try to take pictures of a pooch with ADHD. Yes, that is his butt feather in the top left corner.

Yay Pictures!

What a day for pictures!

We went to the park. I wanted to see if things had changed in the last four days, I know last time I went there was some mad duck sex going on so I was hoping to see some success(since ducks don't you-know for pleasure)!

There is one pair of freaky, AGGRESSIVE birds that just showed up one day. I shall call them Beastling 1 and Beastling 2. I think they laid some eggs a few days ago but they all landed in the water however this did not stop them from being huge assholes to anything that got near them. My mom said they are geese, The Lover says they are ducks and he was attacked by them when he was a tot(haha) I have no freaking clue.

One of the ugly beasts;




While we were hanging out chilling they started fighting with each other, hissing, biting, spraying water everywhere. I guess after running out of energy they were still pissed off because they began chasing the ducks and then us. We quickly moved to avoid Beastly bites.

I think this is one of theirs;



It was nice to see some of the regulars were still hanging about. I've grown quite fond of Broken, though his disability doesn't seem to stop him we always manage to throw some food his way.

He's on the left looking like he's waving a fart away or something;



While it was fun to feed them we were really on the hunt for something more, eggs! They weren't hard to spot as most of the duck mafia were chilling in this particular spot.



They were smart by putting them BEHIND the netting that protects the tree though some did roll off into the water anyways. I guess they are really set on nesting in the mulch around the trees closest to the water.

The proud parents with one of their own in the water;



They let us get really close to the eggs which surprised me. I'm hoping they are that relaxed when/if the babies hatch because I cannot wait to photograph them!

That was the only nest we found which is sad because there are so many mating pairs in the water right now it makes me wonder if people are cracking anything they come across.

Next we spent time with Caesar throwing the ball. He really has a blast breaking out on that field. He even started MARKING today. The only time he's ever done that was at the vet's office right before his balls were cut off. I guess he's feeling like this is home and wants the world to know. As long as it stays outside I don't really care.





Last night I put Caesar in a bucket. I'm a horrible mother(hehehehe).



The sun was setting so we decided to walk downtown before heading back. It's such a pretty time for downtown with the trees in full bloom. It almost looks like a white out, I love it. The trees are already starting to turn green, spring is in a hurry to get out of here...





So all in all a nice evening. I am very glad we got to get out because apparently it is supposed to rain AGAIN tomorrow. UGH.

I've decided I need some sort of signature because it always feels weird just ending a post. So let's go with....

With her toes in the sand...

Flowers

I love taking pictures of flowers probably because it is so easy to make it look pretty. To add any sort of challenge I forced myself to get macro shots without actually having a macro lens.

Here's one;

Orchids and Suicidal Fish

The sun is out again, hooray! That means I got out of the house! The Lover starts work tomorrow so he wanted to get his herb garden all settled in before things got complicated. We hit up Kmart (talk about cheap) and got some onion chives, tomato plants, romaine lettuce, and iceberg lettuce. Right now he is happily planting those along with the leftover cucumber plants on the deck. It was nice to see him so excited over it and I'm happy he has a green thumb because I do not. It will definitely be nice to use those herbs when cooking!


Next we hit up Kroger for some groceries to tide us over until his next paycheck, mainly milk because I usually have a panic attack when my stash gets low, seriously. Anyway the flower "section" is right at the front door and as we walked in The Lover says "Whoa!", stops in his tracks, and makes a beeline to the flowers. They had JUST got a shipment of orchids in and they were GORGEOUS. So pretty we bought TWO. However, the asshole baggers who I told not to bag the milk and did anyways shoved the orchids into the bags breaking off a bloom. What the heck? We also bought a daisy looking plant because I wanted to photograph it, is that sad?

Because I put it in the title, The Lover found one of our Neons all dried up on the floor this morning. This little fishy most likely jumped out of the tank and flopped about a foot before ending his journey. I didn't know Neons could jump out of freaking tanks! Maybe we should get some lids eh?

As soon as The Lover is done planting we are hitting the park to stretch our legs. Poor Caesar has been cooped inside these past FOUR days because of the yucky cold rain. I have to admit, I am pretty excited to see what I've missed in the duck creek thing waterway world. Maybe I should bring my camera in case there are little babies waddling around!

'Til next time!

An Easter Weakness

Thank goodness they are offered only once a year...

Twinkle Toes

There's something about classic swing music that makes you want to get on your feet, grab your Lover, and dance around the living room.

So Pretty!

Life Long To-Do List

I've been thinking lately about the things I want to accomplish before I get whisked away quietly in my sleep at a ripe old age of 135. From the mundane to the insane it goes as follows;

-Improve my photography, grow it as a business, and succeed.

-Become a better painter.

-Have that dream wedding I've just recently decided on. I was never one of those girls to meticulously plan out every minute detail of my dream wedding at age 12 but now that I've snagged a winner the grinds are finally spinning.

-The beach, live by it, retire by it, photograph it, enjoy it. Bring family near it.

-Travel the world. Tropical destinations being a major point.

-Get The Lover onto an airplane though now I'm worried because Alanis wrote about a guy crashing on their first plane ride.

-Become physically fit for the rest of my life which ultimately means owning my own exercise equipment.

-Go on a cruise with The Lover.

-Learn how to cook.

-Own my own business.

-Settle somewhere. This moving around thing is getting a little old. It'd be nice to last more than two years in one place.

-Get another dog....soon.

-Have a hammock on my wrap around poch of our gorgeous beachside home.

-Go to college to further my career goals.

-Give back once I get disgustingly rich.

-Be a part of something bigger than myself.

-Thank soldiers I see on the street for serving us.

-Own a record player.

-Have a vegetable garden on the house on the beach with the wrap around porch.

-Do something for the doggy world. Still working on this one...

-Celebrate my sister's 21st birthday somewhere fabulous.

-Have my own demon spawn.

-Never have an ordinary office job ever.

-Get really good with floral arranging.

-Never worry about finances again.

That's just a small fraction of the demands I've put on myself.

We're Cheap

I have a lot to say I just know how to put it down on paper, or er... on screen... I feel like our lives are incredibly boring and exciting at the same time. It seems like a lot of waiting in between bursts of holy crapness. So until I figure out what I want to truly say I'll tell you about my, our, day today.

We went to bed pretty early last night. Usually we don't hit the ol' sack til 2am but for some reason the bed was calling at us shortly after 11pm. I'll say we slept pretty hardcore until 5am when The Lover and I BOTH woke up for a pee break, tossed for an hour, and decided it's time to get up.

We headed to Shoney's for their freaking amazing breakfast bar. Plates upon plates of scrambled egg, has browns, sausage links, bacon, you name it they've got it. And to mention, it was a heck of a lot cheaper than the awful food we ate the day before.

In this dying mall about a mile away they have this restaurant called Picadilly's that is AWLAYS busy. With really old people. We figured that it was due to the young folks working during daylight hours but soon realized it was because they don't have tastebuds. The advertisment listed a full-size meal for $4.99. That's pretty good for the amount of food pictured on those plates. So we go through an assembly line of food and gather random items thinking we are raking it in. That is until the lady rings us up for $28 dollars. WHAT? Flabbergasted The Lover pays. We sit down to eat but the food SUCKS so bad that I literally wanted to spit the chewed up gunk back onto the plate. It was a bad experience and a lesson learned.

So we made up for it with Shoney's this morning. Good ol Shoney's didn't let us down. Even on our way out The Lover managed to win a toy out of the claw machine on the first try. But then he tried two more times for a Taz only to fail making the pooch's new purple dinosaur chew toy $1.50. We're cheap. Sort of...

Wild Things Two

I have my own little monster living right here under my very own roof! I feel like the parent that shoots their child's every moment and I don't think there is anything wrong with it. Caesar loves getting his picture taken and has since day one. Now if only I can convince The Lover to sit in front of the camera we'd be set!


These are the best of the shoot today...

Wild Things

I remember growing up and seeing this book in the school library. I never picked it up. I never read it. I merely glanced at it. See, I DO judge books by their covers and this one looked like a scary story. At that time in my life I was more interested in the Babysitter Series than being scared out of my wits.

However, not having read the supposed ten sentence story does not stop me from wanting to see this movie. It looks like a child's fantasy run wild.

Weekly Bouquet

So I'm a little late on this update-we've had these flowers since Monday, shoot me.

We have 6, SIX, lovely bouquets sitting around the place making it more lovely! All for NINETEEN dollars. Holy wow! Love, love, LOVE it!!

These are the bouquets I made;




and




These are a few of the bouquets The Lover made. Growing up his grandmother would watch him and she owned a floral shop, well in the meantime he learned how to put together some floral arrangements. He thinks it is deserving to get his Man card taken away, I, on the other hand, think it's cool as heck! I told him my bloggy world would see his work because I LOVE his ideas!






I think the Irises are my favorite!

Another Rainy Day

So my body is once again back in hibernation mode as day THREE of cold, yucky rain continues. This means I haven't gone for a bike ride, I whine when it comes time to take the dog out, and we haven't done our daily walk/sit/play time at the park. This completely bums me out!

Today we both slept in pretty late because really what is there to do in wet sloppy days such as these? We had an appointment with a realtor for a store front downtown. The Lover wants to get his business ideas rolling and while the store was pretty much PERFECT and the landlord was very flexible on EVERYTHING I am still hesitant.

I feel like we may be stretching ourselves thin too soon. He just landed a job and for the first few months he's going to be in training mode, learning the ropes of the company. It's a little unfair to stretch his commitments in two directions at first. Also, opening a store takes money though he has a business plan that could make it start ever so slowly. My number one concern is gathering a nest egg to protect ourselves from another downpour of bad luck (I know, me being the fiscally responsible one? GET OUT). This business he is hoping to start will require money out of pocket unless we snag an investor which then means we owe someone else.

The place truly is splendid for all we want to do, I could already picture paint schemes and set ups. I could even have a little knook for a studio doing pet photography in store to get my name out there. Really, it is EXACTLY what we are looking for but I'm too afraid to jump the gun.

I guess we will see what the next few months bring us...

Something About This Picture

is way totally cool.

And Now Something Light

Someone must have turned quite the blind eye for this design to be approved AND manufactured AND sold. My, my, my....

I'm A Sap...

I'm sorry but this story has me tearing up. Seriously?

HOW COULD YOU? - By Jim Willis, 2001

When I was a puppy, I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh. You called me your child, and despite a number of chewed shoes and a couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend. Whenever I was "bad," you'd shake your finger at me and ask "How could you?" -- but then you'd relent and roll me over for a belly rub.
My housebreaking took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together. I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed and listening to your confidences and secret dreams, and I believed that life could not be any more perfect. We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because "ice cream is bad for dogs" you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day.

Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate. I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you about bad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love. She, now your wife, is not a "dog person" - - still I welcomed her into our home, tried to show her affection, and obeyed her. I was happy because you were happy.

Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement. I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them, too. Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate. Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a "prisoner of love." As they began to grow, I became their friend. They clung to my fur and pulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigated my ears, and gave me kisses on my nose. I loved everything about them and their touch -- because your touch was now so infrequent -- and I would've defended them with my life if need be. I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams, and together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway.

There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me. These past few years, you just answered "yes" and changed the subject. I had gone from being "your dog" to "just a dog ," and you resented every expenditure on my behalf.

Now, you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets. You've made the right decision for your "family," but there was a time when I was your only family

I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter. It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness. You filled out the paperwork and said "I know you will find a good home for her." They shrugged and gave you a pained look. They understand the realities facing a middle-aged dog, even one with "papers." You had to pry your son's fingers loose from my collar as he screamed "No, Daddy! Please don't let them take my dog!" And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life. You gave me a good-bye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you. You had a deadline to meet and now I have one, too. After you left, the two nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago and made no attempt to find me another good home. They shook their heads and asked, "How could you?"

They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow. They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago. At first, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you that you had changed your mind -- that this was all a bad dream... or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me.

When I realized I could not compete with the frolicking for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate, I retreated to a far corner and waited. I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day, and I padded along the aisle after her to a separate room. A blissfully quiet room. She placed me on the table and rubbed my ears, and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. The prisoner of love had run out of days.

As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which she bears weighs heavily on her, and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood. She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago. She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured, "How could you?"

Perhaps because she understood my dog speak, she said, "I'm so sorry." She hugged me, and hurriedly explained it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn't be ignored or abused or abandoned, or have to fend for myself -- a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place. And with my last bit of energy, I tried to convey to her with a thump of my tail that my "How could you?" was not directed at her. It was directed at you, My Beloved Master, I was thinking of you. I will think of you and wait for you forever. May everyone in your life continue to show you so much loyalty.

In Case of Emergency

Character

There's this guy on main street that adds a supreme amount of character to this little downtown even if he doesn't know it. There is a little insurance company that pays people to dress up as the Statue of Liberty and wave to passerbys. This guy on OUR street adds his own little flair to it. This elderly gentleman puts on some headphones and dances away in his liberty get up, spinning, thrusting, and wiggling around on his little square of sidewalk.

Getting a picture of this man is hard as being social with someone who dons headphones makes it impossible but I wanted to capture the spirit of his jive. The best picture I got was of a walk by when he was in the middle of an Elvis impression. I pointed the camera in his direction, walked by, and hoped for the best. I am so pleased with what I captured.



So thank you liberty dancer guy for making this little city a little brighter.

What Goes Around...

The Lover and I have both worked with animals in our past so it just makes sense that we happen to own....several. Right now we only have one mammal, Caesar, but we have several fish. One 65 gallon tank, one 29 gallon tank, and a little fish bowl for the Beta, to be exact.

There seemed to be some issues when the tanks were first set up at the new place. We would both feed causing a lot of debris which in turn causes the tanks to get dirty a lot faster. The Lover never worked with fish and thought I was underfeeding them. So after a few talks we agreed to leaving the feeding to me.

One day I look over at my 29 gallon tank to see The Lover sprinkling some food into the water. Having just fed them earlier I mentioned that the feeding was MY duty and that he needed to promptly put the food down before I kicked him in the shins. I re-explained that "fish are scavengers, they will eat whenever you feed them because they don't know when their next meal is going to be. They do NOT need to be fed that often..." His response was "They swam to the top like they were hungry!!"

A little miffed he put the food away and hasn't touched it since.

Then this evening we were hanging out in the living room with the furry one lying at our feet. I was feeling hungry so went into the kitchen to whip up some food. I noticed little Caesar followed me though he was previously perfectly comfortable in the recliner. As I was sitting at the bar munching on a delicious egg sandwich The Lover decided he wanted a snack and began whipping up some popcorn. Again, the pooch was sitting just outside the invisible line in the kitchen (he's not allowed to hover while we cook).

"I wonder why Caesar hangs out by the kitchen when we cook especially since he doesn't get to eat our food." I said

Without hesitation The Lover replies with "He's a scavenger, he never knows when his next meal is coming..." and throws a piece of popcorn at the pooch.

This Picture Gives Me Happy Thoughts

What I Really Want to Know

How does one get into the wedding business? How does one cope with all the fears and worries of not knocking this one out of the park?

I guess the question really is, why am I letting all these excuses hold me back from accomplishing a dream?

Riddle me this.

Wait A Tick

I just realized that I completely missed announcing the fantastic news we heard at the end of last week. We were spun into such a celebratory mood and with my friend coming in to town we immediately hit the bar. It made our hearts light, our shoulders less heavy, our smiles so much brighter.

We moved without knowing how we were going to pay the bills, with fear and anxiety in our hearts. Not really letting ourselves enjoy too much for fear it'd be swept from right under our feet. Just last week we found out The Lover snagged a position at a pay he was asking for....during a hiring freeze!

The first thought that went through my head was "We made it." We took the risk of moving without a safety net and we made it. The relief is still settling in but it was nice to be able to celebrate freely with my friend in town this past weekend.

Hallelujah!

Dear Obama,

Don’t give banks any money, since they don’t deserve it.
Do make sure banks are stable.

Don’t keep paying people at the financial institutions that got us into this mess.
Do have experienced and knowledgable people oversee the bailout.

Don’t reward people who made bad decisions.
Do make sure people don’t go homeless.

Don’t laugh or make jokes.
Do be upbeat and encouraging.

Don’t raise taxes on anyone, since that’s wealth redistribution.
Do raise taxes on 100 specific individuals who we think deserve it.

Don’t take over companies, since that’s socialist.
Do control everything those companies do.

Don’t allow companies that accepted the bailout money to spend anything, since that’s wasting our tax dollars.
Do make a profit on the bailout money.

Don’t do anything that seems unfair.
Do solve the crisis.

Thanks

7 Creatures You Don't Want to Meet

Apparently there are some mean little fuckers out there (Can I say the f word?) After reading this article I'll be sure to stay out of the ocean, pools, the jungle, and the Amazon.

Awesome

Positivity Takes Creativity

Amidst all the endless days of pure joy and happiness in all things big and small there come the once in a while days that fling poo right into your cheery red face. I guess this happens to be one of those days.

Isn't the past a hard thing to get over? Especially when you still have the shit streaks on your clothes from the massive pile you climbed just recently? Also when the shit stack manages to grow arms and throw more poo at your back?

It's good to move forward, I love going in that direction and hate those moments where you're stuck in the same spot while your mind tries to mull over what the heck that steamy wet one now plopped right on top of you came from. Until your brain learns how to navigate the poop you're stuck in a squishy spot with no toilet paper in sight.

And it's not like you can pick up that poo that continues to splatter on your back and throw it right back; it's poo what does it care? You know that eventually the poo will sink into the Earth and become a faint memory. That the steaming shit pile will get what's coming to it because really what good comes from poo? If you try to bring the damage to the poo yourself well you just get another plop of it right on your head. So it's best to just keep moving forward, ignore the aroma, ignore the infrequent slaps on your back, and trudge forward until the muck turns into green grass.

Then you know you've made it, that you're better off now. You wouldn't be able to enjoy this green grass without the pains you went through to get here. But the sight is breathtaking, the scent is a pleasure, the joy and the happiness are shining bright and that poo? That poo was just a test of your might, a challenge. A checkpoint to make sure you really deserved this field full of growth and light. So with a shit eating grin you keep moving forward because now you know every poo pile can lead you to happiness.

And that's the last time I associate poo with joy. Promise.

Guilty of Setting A Man Free

I had a rough childhood. Things were constantly constricting like I was spending my days in the same pair of too tight underwear too afraid to get it off because it also happens to bite. I was held back from experiencing a lot of things I wish I had. It was a growing pain I gained a lot from.

For instance, I learned to cherish the good things and the simple things. To count my blessings even though that tight underwear was cutting off my circulation I still HAD underwear. It feels almost natural to be in constant reminder of what I have now no matter how small and just for THAT I am grateful. Grateful for being grateful.

Another important lesson I took away from that underwear was to be happy NO MATTER WHAT. I had a long time to realize what unhappiness felt like. Sometimes it was too hard to keep afloat, sometimes the sadness just seeped into my mouth drizzling down my throat with the force of the ocean. It didn't mean I gave up it just meant I had to work hard to get over the wave. However, each new near drowning experience brought me one step closer to the ideal growing in my head. It's a very sincere idea that sticks with you as a sort of running motto for the life you lead. To put it simply, the heaven I ran to when the rain poured down was simply "Be happy".

That meant taking the time each day to be cheerful, light, without worry. To physically send myself to a place of positivity. It wasn't easy at first to shift through the clouds, it took practice like any other habit but eventually it became easier. So easy. I am going to be happy which has the hard price tag of never settling for second best.

Possibly some would consider this selfish, I say those people are NOT happy and wish they could let go of these invisible binds they have created in their OWN mind to be HAPPY finally. When you realize that you have a choice in the matter to let life carry on under the premise of "doing what I thought was right" or "knowing what I want for happiness" things seem to unravel as if by magic.

I've set the pathway for ultimate happiness in my life. I have one guideline and that is my heart. If I can't sleep at night with decisions I have made or plan to make then I change it. The doorway is wide open and I have no idea where this journey will take me but I know that I have burdened myself with the duty of seeking happiness every single day.

I've recently just opened the eyes of one I care for deeply and it's incredible to see the strain unwind. As if thousands of tiny men with long ropes hooked into this person's back were holding him back and now, as they realize the freedom in happiness these ropes are snapping making the journey lighter and lighter.

Afterall we only have one life, one opportunity to make it right, don't we owe it to ourselves to make it a damn fine ride? What's the point of continuing if we choose to live in sadness? What kind of journey is that?

Basically it goes like this;

Never settle. Seek Happiness Always.

Toys

The Lover and his toys. I knew when I first met him he was a big kid at heart and honestly that's one of the major points I fell in love with. It's a point we both mesh on. It's great to still get excited about playgrounds, to venture the toy store every now and then (let me tell you Toys R Us is not how I remember it to be, a major disappointment), to love the lego car racer we got in our Trix cereal. I love that about us a lot but The Lover, I'm noticing, has quite expensive tastes in "toys".

He has train collections, arcade games, hard to get movie posters, comic book collectibles including toys of the animated crew, and now a pool table. A big ass pool table sitting right in the middle of the supposed dining area. Granted it was a deal almost too good to pass up but it meant my own ass lugging heavy freaking pool crap up our stairs.

So while I think toys are fun and great there seems to be a thin line between having a dining room and acquiring a new game room. For all this he promised me a new spot for the dining table we've been oggling for a little while.

He says this is his "Retirement Plan".

Bossom Bee

While we are on the topic of breasticles I thought I'd go ahead and blog about an event including them, mine. Let me start out by saying that I have never been stung by a bee nor nibbled on by a bumble bee, or in any sort of pain caused by the yellow and black. In my 24 years on this life I've managed to skip the "pleasure" of comparing various pains to "what a bee sting feels like". Just yesterday that story almost changed.

See we were on the road with the windows down enjoying the full blast of cool air rushing into the car as we finally had some nice weather! Trailing along I suddenly felt something on my nose. It felt heavier than hair so I reached up to wipe it away. It falls right into my cleavage, what bug falls down when your wipe it away??

I look down and see a somewhat fuzzy bug with black and yellow stripes. That's when I freak out and start stabbing at my chest with my hand trying to get to it before it got me. Meanwhile, The Lover in the driver's seat is trying to figure out why I'm screaming, staring at my chest, and beating the shit out of his crown jewels.

After about 30 seconds I slowed to see if it was smushed in my bra (gross) or if I had more stabbing to do. I couldn't find the thing. It was NOWHERE to be found. "GREAT!" I thought, I have no idea if it came out on one of my upward movements or what but now I had to search everywhere for this freakish breast attacker. The Lover didn't necessarily help my spazz attack by saying things like "If it's not dead it could crawl up our legs and sting us" and "You sure it's not in your bra somewhere? Want me to pull over so you can look?"

We never did find it and I couldn't confirm if it was in fact a bee or something worse, he seemed a little furry but those stripes were enough convincing for me to fight. I can only imagine what the entire debacle looked like to people walking in the streets, or riding passed us, or even from The Lover's viewpoint. At least my quick ninja moves saved me from one of the worst pains known to man however it was far too close this time...

What Will They Think Of Next?

Yep, those are boobies. And yes, they're right next to the Winnie the Pooh claw machine.

Only in Japan.

Overdraft Fees

I hate em, you hate em, we all hate em. In fact, I'm pretty sure Mr. Obama the President hates them too though I doubt he sees them, or ever will, with his impressive 400k/year salary. At least let's hope the leader of Fiscal Responsibility doesn't fall prey to overdraft fees.

One time I had to fight the entire food chain of Wachovia to get back $270 dollars, (TWO HUNDRED SEVENTY DOLLARS!!!!) of overdraft fees because they decided out of the blue to hold off on SHOWING a deposit to my account though it had been done days before. Eventually I got the money back and promptly closed my account. Honestly, I'm amazed this bank fell under with all the fees they've managed to acrue. Wachovia is also the type of bank to kindly draft largest check to smallest so they can hit you as hard as possible. EVIL!

Well now it seems our voice gets its chance to be heard! Hooray! Docket No. R-1343 gives us the chance to make overdraft fees an option, you know for those who hate seeing DECLINED and would rather pay $45 for some nuggets instead of going without. You have until March 30th to email regs.comments@federalreserve.gov with your desire just be sure to label the Subject line with the Docket number. For an online form and more information go here and remind the banks it's US they need to start tending to.

Philosophy

The Lover; "It's a good investment!"

On trying to convince me to play Bingo.

haha <3

This Weeks Bouquet

Finally the local floral shop was open at time a we happened to pass. They had BEAUTIFUL flowers and for so super cheap! Now I know exactly where to go for my little experiments, I'm so excited!!

I Hate The Cold

My body and I are in agreement, the cold is for the birds. I hate the freezing temperatures add some wind and you've got Kern cuddled under the blankets for the entire day. No long walks with the dog, no meeting and greeting neighbors, no more walking to the Post Office. Screw that.

My feet are cold even though I've got thick socks on, I have layers upon layers of clothes on to trap any heat in, I've even go so far as to turn the heat back on. What a cruel trick for Mother Nature to play on us, to bribe us outside with sunshine and warmth only to take it away in a day's time. How unfair!

So to ward off the chill in my bones I'll list my favorite things about summertime bliss;

-Flowers, fresh, colorful, vibrant flowers. The paints of Mother Nature on the canvas of Mother Earth.

-Tank tops, shorts, less clothes, even bathing suits! More skin means happy men and darker tans.

-Swimming. In a pool, in an ocean, but not a lake (The Lover being an ex-cop has too many dead body in lake stories, nothankyou). Swimming like a fish so totally weightless and free.

-Picnics or cookouts. When we went to the park on a 4 mile hike we passed several families gathered around grills hot and smoking carrying delicious smells our way. Steaks, corn on the cob, Mom's potato and pasta salads. Cheeseburgers topped with the freshest ingredients, salt potatos, my stepdad's infamous State Fair Chicken. Oh, the flavors of the summer.

-Community, getting out to see your neighbor after a long hibernation. Going out with friends to lounge on the porches of restaurants (ones that serve alcohol, yes please!). Bringing your dog along to enjoy the company.

-The Beach, oh I could spend a whole post on the beloved beach. The sand, the smell, the atmosphere. Everything about the beach is perfect indeed.

-Bikes! Preferably, this bike!

-Flip flops. I own more flip flops than any other shoe I have collected over the years. One can not own too many flip flops! Squishy, comfy, breezy flip flops!

-Picture Opportunities seem to grow exponentially during the summer. It's hard for me to find beauty in the ugly dead scenes of winter (which is a challenge I'll take but still) but add in some sun, a little green, and subjects to shoot come out of the woodwork.

-Tropical drinks! Nothing says summer like a nice cold strawberry daiquiri seated right next to your lawn chair as you soak in the rays. Who drinks the colorful fruity blends of flavor and alcohol in the winter? No one, that's who!

-Open windows that let fresh air swim through the rooms mixing up the dust and stink of Old Evil Cold. Even rainfall seems more beautiful during warmer days.

Well, that list alone has warmed my soul up a couple degrees. Hopefully it will linger a few more days as the temperatures get warmer!

Can I have?

Oh please, oh please, oh please! Will the bike fairy drop this pretty little thing on my doorstep pretty please with a cherry on top? Today I even sat on her to make sure the fit was right and she felt glorious! She's pink, she has mud fenders, wide beautiful handlebars just asking for a basket to keep little Caesar when we venture out. She's the perfect thing for city riding, heavy enough to keep thieves away, bouncy enough to subdue the mild bumps. She is oh so pretty! I promise to ride her all over town, to adorn her with a cute little bell just like she deserves. She'll skate proudly along the roads fitting right in to our happy little city.

Please, please, please??

From Ear to Happy Ear

Thrifty

We may live in a "posh" place but we certainly don't spend like we do. (The whole, not having a job thing...) So to decorate this large space we've had to come up with some creative ideas and here is just one.

We brought a wardrobe The Lover had used as a partition in our old basement. It had taken some wear and tear over the years so one side is not so good for presentation. The Lover closed it into a triangle with the yucky part against the wall, mentioning he'd love some sort of light fixture to go in the center to make it a stand alone lamp! I grabbed some icicle lights, fiddled around for a few minutes, then voila! A made with love contemporary light that "looks like we captured fireflies" per The Lover. So easy! So cheap! So pretty!

Interesting Enough

This Is Awesome!

This website has people submit pictures of people from their youth along with a duplicate of their grown up selves, in the same pose, same clothes, etc. Some of these pictures are hilarious!

What A Freaking Day!

Jeez Louise eatin cheese in the summer breeze!!

When it rains it pours. Luckily, we are pretty used to it and therefore prepared by bringing our umbrellas with us everywhere we go. After a hectic morning into afternoon I needed to get out to explore this small, divine world of mine.

I took the pooch with me because he rocks and is a convenient conversation starter. We made our way to a little cafe I've been dying to try out. They loved Caesar and I loved their Caesar salad in return. After that we needed to stretch our legs so we headed down the main thoroughfare towards some flashing lights and signs for road blockage. We were doing pretty good until the four legged one shat, right on the sidewalk, in front of everyone. Thanks Dog, 'preciate it!

Anyway, we walked down the closed road because I guess we like danger. No actually I was trying to avoid danger, the traffic was crazy trying to see what was going on and turn off at the same time so we kept going and crossed on the barren street. I saw some firemen so figured it was just a gas leak, the air did smell kind of funky. Maybe that's why he pooped.

We made our way to the park right behind the house. I sat on the grass, released his leash (shh, don't tell anyone) and tossed a ball for the chap. He started panting but I think it was a smile-NO- a grin, from big ol happy ear to happy ear. He sprawled out on the cool grass as just the two of us enjoyed the duck pond and soaked in the growth from the trees.

It completely renewed our spirits and made me fall a little more in love with this place. It's a good place for me, and for the pooch, all errr shitting aside. The Lover likes it too I think though he's had a rough start. Just today I met the owner of the cafe, the local banker, some bartenders down the street, a nice family with ecstatic children hoping to pet my furball, the owner of the store beneath us, and our landlord even brought some treats over. All in all this town is pulling out all the stops to impress us and it's doing a damn good job.

Oh and that "gas leak" was apparently a big matter. Some auger chipped right into the gas line causing it to leak like crazy. The news said "huge fiery explosion a real threat!" which I happened to miss until AFTER I got home safely. What's more weird is I kept having dreams of explosions last night, greeeeeeeat. Not this time Bob-oh!

The Park and The Sun

We are in love! There is a little park complete with duck pond, benches, and a creepy helicopter just a block away. Now that the weather is shaping up and the sun is sticking around we will be visiting a lot more often. I brought my camera and the pooch since the two seem to go so well together.

This was my favorite shot of the entire evening and I can now see how addictive it is to shoot the sun.

Hell Yes!

New York Attorney General and House Financial Services Committee Chair Barney Frank demand names of those receiving million dollar bonuses to be released.

March 9, 2009

Kenneth D. Lewis Chairman, Chief Executive & President
Bank of America Corporation
100 Tryon Street Charlotte, North Carolina 28201
c/o Cleary Gottlieb Steen & Hamilton

Re: Bonus Information

Dear Mr. Lewis:

We write to demand on behalf of taxpayers that Bank of America immediately disclose individual bonus data for all individuals at Merrill Lynch and Bank of America who received 2008 bonus awards of $1 million or more.

We believe that as a matter of transparency and disclosure, taxpayers have a right to know where their tax dollars go once received by TARP recipients. Accordingly, all TARP recipient institutions should disclose individualized executive bonus information to taxpayers.

As you know, late last year Merrill Lynch moved up its planned date to allocate bonuses and then richly rewarded many of its executives. Merrill Lynch did this knowing full well that they were going to suffer huge losses for the fourth quarter and the year. At the time of the bonus awards, Merrill was in the process of being acquired by Bank of America, a TARP recipient. Moreover, Merrill Lynch also knew at the time that they had received a credit line of billions of dollars, in TARP funds.

As a result of Merrill's huge losses, taxpayers were forced to help Bank of America acquire Merrill by providing billions of additional TARP funds as well as insurance against losses from Merrill's toxic portfolio. In short, the combined Bank of America-Merrill Lynch entity received $45 billion in taxpayer funds as well as $188 million in taxpayer-funded insurance.

Despite this massive infusion of taxpayer money, Merrill Lynch paid out bonuses totaling approximately $3.6 billion and Bank of America distributed a pool of more than $3.3 billion.

Taxpayers who are footing the bill obviously demand accountability and want to know who received these funds and why.

Our mutual goal is to stabilize and enhance our country's financial institutions and system. The taxpayers of this country have given mightily to that cause. They deserve to know where their money is going and how it is being spent. Furthermore, we all agree that trust and confidence in our financial system must be restored. Transparency and disclosure are the building blocks of that trust and confidence.

Your refusal to reveal compensation information fuels distrust and cynicism at a most sensitive time.

Very truly yours,

Andrew Cuomo
Attorney General of the State of New York

Barney Frank
Attorney General of the
Chairman, House Financial
Services Committee
U.S. House of Representatives

Bloggy Award Time!!1

Hooray! My first Blog Award Evar! Awarded by this lovely lady. Thank You!!


So now I'm supposed to list ten things you don't know about me. I've been slacking on this post because I really can't think of things this place DOESN'T know except super secrets of awesomeness and sorry, those are just too much!

So here goes a weak attempt to list ten things;
1. Since I was a kid I always thought I was "destined" to be an actress, that one day someone would find me and life would be nothing but net. Sometimes I secretly wish to be living the crazy life of luxury. Millions upon millions of dollars in my account? Yes, please!

2. I have cold extremities all the time. Doesn't matter how warm it is outside my hand and feet will be blue.

3. Growing up I used to have wavy hair, not the pretty kind, the messy lame kind that never did anything for me. Then at 15 I got a perm, a crazy 80's obsession perm, though I hated it at first I loved once it loosened up and surprisingly the curls have stayed since.

4. I want one of my pictures to make Flickr Explore. I don't know why because there's a lot of stuff on there that shouldn't and it's just an algorithm that decides but I love the go boost I get when the comments pile up. (Just a little bit.)

5. I love cheesy reality shows. Eat them up!

6. I'm a libra.

7. Now that I live downtown I'm not sure I want to live anywhere else. With everything at my fingertips life is too convenient.

8. Though I love chocolate I am not a big fan of other types of sweets. I hope that evens out the bad and the good.

9. I believe in Karma.

10. I like garlic sauce for my pizza.

OHMIGOD I MADE IT.

Ok now I get to tag ten people for this award but I don't even know if 10 people read this. So if you read this you're tagged, just leave me a comment to let me know you took it.

People Are Crazy

The one bad thing about living downtown is that it completely shuts down on Sundays which is too bad because we love a mean brunch. Anyway we decided to get into our car and actually venture out into the world searching for food. After eating we went to this nearly dilapidated mall to check out the arcade.

We had fun, arcades seem to be our thing to do. We go a lot, well more than I ever have before I met The Lover. Anyway, he kicked my ass at air hockey (twice) and basketball and we gave our tickets to some kids. Well, I did, The Lover didn't want to look like a pedophilia freak (I can't blame him in today's world, even when someone is trying to do something nice they're suspect).

After that excitement we went to this little knick knack store right beside the arcade. We found all sorts of weird stuff, angel fairy wind chimes, sport teams welcome mats, rather large African safari stuffed creatures. (Side story; The Lover has been wanting a tall giraffe to put in front of a banister in this new place, so far I've been winning the battle, I almost lost today when he found a 4 foot one at this store, are you kidding me?) We found a neat muppet stage arena complete with muppets. We both tried them on and giggled away as we created new characters, you wouldn't believe our real age if you saw us.

Anyhow, on our way out I noticed these dolls sitting on a rack. I picked up a black one and held it as if it were mine, turned to The Lover and said "Honey, I have some splainin' to do". We laughed, we cried, we put it back before we got into trouble. There were thousands of these freaky doll like things. As I turned I noticed a lady with a stroller talking to the poor cashier about these dolls, how adorable they were, the precious expressions forever implanted on their faces, on and on she went. I just happened to glance into her stroller and you wouldn't believe there was one of those freaky fake babies laying in it all snuggled up. I actually did a double take and waited for The Lover to take notice.

I had to leave, there were just too many scenarios going through my mind that could possibly cause a full grown woman to go to such lengths for a doll and be so openly verbal about it. Holy brain problems.

Mexicans Love or Need Underwear

So Obama decided to personally hand them some while balancing tacos on his head. Or at least that's my interpretation of this hot mess.



More bad...err...awesome paintings of the Prez.

Love Is Hard To Understand

So this guy tried to put it simply;

Love=Love
Love-mind+body=Lust
but
Love-body+mind=True Love

for a bit higher math

iLove+uLove= I Love You 2

iLove=Fantasy

(Love+Technology)xdistance=Computer Love

Love+british accent= Love...Actually

God+Love+salvation=+/- 1 son

Love+direction=affection

Love+repetition-reason=obsession

and for some random ones to end things up...

Love+Love=relationship
Love+Lust=hurt feelings
Lust+Lust=short relationship
(attraction+no attraction)x alcohol=good night, bad morning.
Love+Love+Lust=sticky situation

On a side note; The Lover is cooking dinner (yes at 10:30pm, we're late bloomers) and picked up a towel off a stack of clean ones I had just folded. I had to laugh because unknowingly he decided to throw a bathroom on the floor for your wet feet towel over his shoulder Chef Style. Sorry Love, you've more convincing to do.

Puke In My Mouth

If anyone watches SNL then you are most likely aware of the "Jizz In My Pants" phenomenon.

Well here is a sequel made by some awesome ladies.

I Don't Belong In The Kitchen

At all! We bought a lot of groceries yesterday that we bagged ourselves. I put the dry food in the pantry while The Lover stocked the fridge. Me being the fantastic culinary retard that I am put a pre-made Manwich jug in the pantry. When he asked for it this evening without hesitation I say "Second shelf by the cereal" and it doesn't hit me until he replies with "Uh, it had meat in it which means it should be in the fridge." almost in his "You're-special-let-me-slowly-talk-so-you-can-keep-up voice.

Whoops. Game over.

Lucky To Be In Love With My Best Friend

That's my ringtone, ringback tone and theme song. Those words speak straight to the heart, my heart, his heart. This was one of the things I was mulling in my head while I tossed and turned last night as he gently snored next to me snug as a bug in a rug.

For the first time in my life I can say honest to goodness I have no complaints about this relationship. You know, we have the usual "tiffs" that any normal human companionship will come across. Like why the heck does the toilet seat have to be up all the time? and I drive better than you, to that's not how you do laundry, etc. But really we are both so mellow that they just end up in hugs and kisses (I know, puke).

We've both been jobless since mid-december and have spent a ton of time together, a lot! I am so proud at how well we've gotten along during it all, especially in an ever difficult time. Shoot, our relationship started on some pretty rough terrain and we're only going up! Typically I need to claim my space, give myself some breathing room, soak in life, but with him the need hasn't been there, I want him to soak it in with me, to share my thoughts about life and mull it over as a team against the world.

Are you gagging yet?

I am completely satisfied with the 180 turn my life has taken from previously. It's a fantastic breath of fresh air that I hope never ends.

Anyone else feel so hopelessly in love like you've walked right out of a song, a movie, like it was meant to be?